tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-367646222024-02-21T04:09:44.550-08:00ZIMLINGHAUS.COMHello and welcome. My name is Kenny Zimlinghaus. I'm a comedian from NYC. The name Zimlinghaus is German for Zimlinghaus.Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comBlogger175125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-5025976362164682542010-12-12T14:02:00.000-08:002010-12-12T14:12:02.306-08:00This site is done.. <br /><br />Please visit <a HREF ="Http://www.kennyzimlinghaus.com">kennyzimlinghaus.com</a><br /><br />thank youKenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-86905762228514019732010-06-30T04:26:00.000-07:002010-11-22T09:27:52.452-08:00चेक आउट माय उप्कोमिंग दतेस!I HAVE A NEW WEBSITE...<br /><br />Its <a href="www.kennyzimlinghaus.com">kennyzimlinghaus.com</a><br /><br /><br /><br />December 18th - Kansas City CZAR BAR 8pm <a href="http://wanttickets.com">tickets I think here</a><br /><br /><br /><br /><embed src='http://www.rooftopcomedy.com/flash/fmpv3/RooftopPlayerEmbedded.swf' bgcolor='#161513' flashVars='baseURL=http://www.rooftopcomedy.com&clipCode=NotInMyWildestDreams' width='448' height='292' allowFullScreen='true' allowScriptAccess='always' pluginspage='http://www.macromedia.com/shockwave/download/index.cgi?P1_Prod_Version=ShockwaveFlash'></embed><br /><br /><br /><embed src='http://www.rooftopcomedy.com/flash/fmpv3/RooftopPlayerEmbedded.swf' bgcolor='#161513' flashVars='baseURL=http://www.rooftopcomedy.com&clipCode=ImJealousOfGirls' width='448' height='292' allowFullScreen='true' allowScriptAccess='always' pluginspage='http://www.macromedia.com/shockwave/download/index.cgi?P1_Prod_Version=ShockwaveFlash'></embed><br /><br /><br /><embed src='http://www.rooftopcomedy.com/flash/fmpv3/RooftopPlayerEmbedded.swf' bgcolor='#161513' flashVars='baseURL=http://www.rooftopcomedy.com&clipCode=FreezingFeet' width='448' height='292' allowFullScreen='true' allowScriptAccess='always' pluginspage='http://www.macromedia.com/shockwave/download/index.cgi?P1_Prod_Version=ShockwaveFlash'></embed><br /><br /><strong></strong>Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-66350854257904972292010-05-18T03:40:00.000-07:002010-06-28T09:50:14.973-07:00July 14th Louisville KY Improv <br /><br /><a href="http://www.improvlouisville.com/calendar.html">Tickets here</a><br /><br /><br />July 15th Nashville TN Zanies<br /><br /><a href-"http://www.nashville.zanies.com/news.php?viewStory=1030&Page=http://www.ticketbiscuit.com/ZaniesNashville/EventPage.aspx?EID=62978&">Tickets here</a>Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-57613522181232285202010-04-02T05:15:00.000-07:002010-05-07T05:28:42.272-07:00लाइव शोव्स!<strong><br />MAY 8th Boston</strong><br /><br />Boston "Laugh Out Lymphoma" Charity show <a href="http://www.havefunforcharity.com/"> Tickets here</a><br /><br /><strong>Wilmington NC May 12th</strong> at Nutt Street Comedy Room <a href="http://www.soapboxlaundrolounge.com/nuttstreet/index.html">Nutt Street comedy room</a><br /><br /><a href="https://www.etix.com/ticket/servlet/onlineSale?action=selectPerformance&performance_id=1244562">Tickets here</a><br /><br /><br /><strong>May 14th and 15th Ft. Myers FLorida</strong><br /><br />The Laugh-In Comedy Cafe <a href="http://www.laughincomedycafe.com/index.html">Info and tix here</a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Okay there's more, SOON.<br /><br />Thank you.Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-47626993915576869272010-03-25T04:01:00.000-07:002010-03-25T04:04:21.302-07:00फिल्ली शो ticketsHi.<br /><br />I'm doing a show in Philadelphia on April 23rd. Tickets just went on sale.<br /><br /><br />April 23rd 8:30 (doors)<br /><br />Connies Ric Rac This show is BYOB and I find that very exciting. So BYOB.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/105698">Tickets can be gotten here</a><br /><br /><br /><br />Come out. More shows posted very soon.<br /><br />ThanksKenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-79328753359683666872010-03-15T07:02:00.000-07:002010-03-15T07:05:53.101-07:00कॉमेडी ओं थे कंप्यूटर रेडियो!<a href="http://www.thecomedynerds.com/2010/03/seizing-comedy-opportunities/">Comedy Nerds podcast</a><br /><br /><br />I did this internet radio show...it got deep. <br /><br /><br />Check it out if you wish.Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-50859900651919015332010-02-16T06:28:00.000-08:002010-03-08T05:55:46.428-08:00This Thursday night at The FunnyBone in Hartford CT 7:30. <br /><br /><a href="http://www.symfonee.com/funnybone/hartford/comedians/Bio.aspx?ShowDate=3/11/10&Uid={64303a10-68e3-475b-aad7-b85b9159979a}">Tickets are here</a><br /><br />Thanks.<br /><br /><br /><embed src='http://www.rooftopcomedy.com/flash/fmpv3/RooftopPlayerEmbedded.swf' bgcolor='#161513' flashVars='baseURL=http://www.rooftopcomedy.com&clipCode=NotInMyWildestDreams' width='448' height='292' allowFullScreen='true' allowScriptAccess='always' pluginspage='http://www.macromedia.com/shockwave/download/index.cgi?P1_Prod_Version=ShockwaveFlash'></embed><br /><br /><br /><br /><embed src='http://www.rooftopcomedy.com/flash/fmpv3/RooftopPlayerEmbedded.swf' bgcolor='#161513' flashVars='baseURL=http://www.rooftopcomedy.com&clipCode=CraftmaticAdjustableBed' width='448' height='292' allowFullScreen='true' allowScriptAccess='always' pluginspage='http://www.macromedia.com/shockwave/download/index.cgi?P1_Prod_Version=ShockwaveFlash'></embed><br /><br /><br /><br /><embed src='http://www.rooftopcomedy.com/flash/fmpv3/RooftopPlayerEmbedded.swf' bgcolor='#161513' flashVars='baseURL=http://www.rooftopcomedy.com&clipCode=FreezingFeet' width='448' height='292' allowFullScreen='true' allowScriptAccess='always' pluginspage='http://www.macromedia.com/shockwave/download/index.cgi?P1_Prod_Version=ShockwaveFlash'></embed><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Thank.Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-16881330303723025072010-02-02T04:13:00.000-08:002010-02-02T04:17:09.728-08:00COMING UP!<br /><br /><br />Feb 12th and 13th in Boston! <a href="http://www.ticketfusion.com/store/one/index.html?store_id=13353&master_store_id=13353&page_type=master_ticket&show_id=480334&qid=8098101018&cid=">Tickets for Mottleys</a><br /><br /><br /><br />March 5th "The Flaming Hearth" - Farmingville 8pm. <br /><br /><a href="http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/97185">TICKETS FOR THIS</a><br /><br /><br />Thank you.Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-3674688709252270292010-01-05T08:41:00.001-08:002010-01-25T04:17:47.626-08:00२०१० कॉमेडी शो दतेस!!!Hello. Thanks for coming to the site! Here are some dates you can come see me tell jokes and what not coming up in OH TEN!<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>JANUARY 28th-31st</strong> Go Bananas Cincinatti, Ohio<br /><strong><br />February 6th</strong>, Boston "Magners Comedy Festival" - Tommy's Comedy Lounge.<br /><br /><strong>February 12th and 13th "Valentine's Day Weekend" </strong> BOSTON Mottley's Comedy Club<br /><br /><a href="http://www.ticketfusion.com/store/one/index.html?store_id=13353&master_store_id=13353&page_type=master_ticket&show_id=480334&qid=7498973664&cid=">Tickets here</a><br /><br /><br /><strong>March 5th 8pm "Flaming Hearth" 756 Horseblock Road, Farmingville</strong>, NY 11738<br /><a href="http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/97185">TICKETS!</a><br /><br /><br />More to come. Thanks!Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-14996707662748911452009-11-17T11:44:00.001-08:002009-11-17T12:21:41.013-08:00थे एंड ऑफ़ थे वर्ल्डIt's over in 2012, right?
<br />
<br />We're done.
<br />
<br />
<br />The end of the world. How can I prepare myself for The White House falling from the sky? Or being hit by a ship?
<br />
<br />Oh, imagine being hit by a ship? An enormous tanker moving so slowly. Oh that'd be a terrible fail.
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<br />"I got crushed by a building, how'd you die?"
<br />
<br />"Oh, its funny actually...the White House fell on me. I was in Colorado."
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<br />"Wow! Crazy. I got hit by an oil tanker. On land."
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<br />"You slow fuck."
<br />
<br />
<br />If you think people don't give a shit about you now, imagine how they will be during the end of the world.
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<br />
<br />"Excuse me, you're stomping on my kid...yeah just let him up, okay, now you're biting him..AAAAAHH, you're eating my son! You are eating my kin!"
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<br />Then Mt. Rushmore explodes in your face.
<br />
<br />Get a <a href="http://72hours.org/go_bag.html">Go Bag</a>.
<br />
<br />There is a meteor shower tonight. Early tomorrow morning actually.
<br />
<br />
<br /><img src="http://theamateurastronomer.com/meteor-shower.jpg"</a>
<br />
<br />
<br /><a href="http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2009/11/091116-leonids-meteor-shower-best-2009.html">here's a link to NATGEO.
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<br />
<br />
<br /><img src="http://img.alibaba.com/photo/11528546/Used_Vessel_Oil_Tanker.jpg"</a>
<br />ridiculously slow.
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<br />
<br />Did you notice that National Geographic link above? It says NatGeo. That's what we call National Geographic now? NatGeo. The world has already ended.
<br />
<br />NatGeo? It doesn't work. It's too exxxtreme for National Geographic. Didn't they have credibility? They were able to show titties before most magazines. Because they were National Geographic. So when you approached a naked tribal woman you could say, with a hint of an english accent, "Excuse me, may I take your photo for National Geographic Magazine?"
<br />
<br />
<br />And the tribeswoman, knowing that her life would be made better because of the reputation of such a class act, obliged.
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<br />But NatGeo skates by on their board and snaps a pic from their cell.
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<br />
<br />And we all just accept NesQuik??? Like nothing? No fight about this. They did this one overnight whilst we were asleep.
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<br />Nestle's Quick became NesQuik.
<br />
<br />Drink NesQuik. Fuck you.
<br />
<br />
<br />I still drink it. I love it.
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<br />
<br />
<br />
<br /><img src=""</a>
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<br />
<br />Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-20053778795317669242009-11-13T04:01:00.000-08:002009-11-13T04:02:42.112-08:00माय फवोरिते विडियो!THanks Emily for sending me this.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Remember these guys?<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/NmN4-V8xPFI&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/NmN4-V8xPFI&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />aahahahhhhhahhahaha!Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-52452362724587698892009-10-30T16:04:00.000-07:002009-10-30T16:05:38.841-07:00हैप्पी HalloweenHappy Halloween.Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-84105657790585058232009-10-29T11:44:00.001-07:002009-10-29T12:00:59.055-07:00इ दोन'टी लिखे स्टीप क्लुब्सI'm straight. Really.
<br />I love girls. I love naked girls. I love to have sex with girls.
<br />I love breasts and all of that.
<br />
<br />I don't like strip clubs.
<br />
<br />The last time I was at a strip club I watched a fairly gross drunk girl take a nose dive off the stage in to a chair. I liked that.
<br />
<br />but to me, hanging out with girls and paying them money so they pay you attention seems a little lame.
<br />
<br />
<br />Not to mention you are surrounded by horned up dudes with hard-ons. Really. Its like some bizarre fully clothed orgy or TruBlood fest with just guys.
<br />
<br />I always have that mentality with strippers like "I can take you away from all of this". Truth is, they most likely make more money than me and I can take them away from nothing. I should be like "take me away from all of this".
<br />
<br />
<br />My father once bought me a 25 min lap dance for a birthday and it was rough. literally. Rough. I felt like my Dad paid a girl (hot) to wrestle me for a half hour and I couldn't use my hands. She won.
<br />
<br />I'm not against stripping or strip clubs and will most likely still go (in hopes of watching liquored up naked girls take more faceplants) but to me its just not fun.
<br />
<br />Eh...maybe I'm a nerd or too much of a wuss and I should just go in there with a wad of cash and celebrate life and pay for grinding.
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Here are some of my favorite stripper pics:
<br />
<br /><img src="http://www.omgsoysauce.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/fat-stripper-pole.jpg"</a>
<br />
<br />
<br /><img src="http://loot-ninja.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/muscle-stripper.jpg"</a>
<br />I wrestled her. Him?
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />That's allKenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-4608712392882992262009-10-27T09:48:00.001-07:002009-10-27T09:48:13.764-07:00I'm in a video.<div>Check out this video for Late Night with Jimmy Fallon.<br /></div><br /><script type="text/javascript" src="http://widgets.nbc.com/o/4727a250e66f9723/4ae7244d745dd83b/4727a250e66f9723/8dcc7458/widget.js"></script><div style="font:10px arial;width:300px;margin-top:3px;"><a href="http://www.nbc.com/Video/library/" target="_blank">Video Recaps</a> | <a href="http://www.nbc.com/Video/library/full-episodes/" target="_blank">Full Episodes</a> | <a href="http://www.nbc.com/Video/library/webisodes/" target="_blank">Webisodes</a></div>Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-36092512390166254402009-10-27T09:42:00.000-07:002009-10-27T09:45:34.033-07:00परनोर्मल एक्टिविटी ट्रेलर परोडी!!!Check out this video for Late Night with Jimmy Fallon!<br /><br /><br /><br /><object type="application/x-shockwave-flash" data="http://widgets.nbc.com/o/4727a250e66f9723/4ae71ff342305a49/4727a250e66f9723/40f253a3/-cpid/302993525cb0d1fe" id="W4727a250e66f97234ae71ff342305a49" width="384" height="283"><param name="movie" value="http://widgets.nbc.com/o/4727a250e66f9723/4ae71ff342305a49/4727a250e66f9723/40f253a3/-cpid/302993525cb0d1fe" /><param name="wmode" value="transparent" /><param name="allowNetworking" value="all" /><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always" /><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /></object><br /><br /><br />Thanks.Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-47287209683302677932009-10-16T05:01:00.001-07:002009-10-16T05:01:52.781-07:00<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/8ia6bpOAEfY&hl=en&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/8ia6bpOAEfY&hl=en&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-12625323869722482972009-09-21T04:12:00.000-07:002009-09-21T04:16:00.289-07:00स्चेनेक्टाद्य न्य शो ओं सेल!Tickets for the Schenectady NY show on OCTOBER 3rd are on sale now!<br /><br /><br />It's at a place called <a href="http://www.vandycklounge.com/index.php">The Van Dyck Restaurant and Lounge</a>.<br /><br />It's a cool spot.<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://www.vandycklounge.com/entertainment.php">Tickets</a> are only $10!!!<br /><br />Saturday night October 3rd at 8pm in Schenectady NY! SIIIIIICK!<br /><br /><br /><br />Please come! <br /><br />Thanks<br /><br />kennyKenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-58808134629969732782009-09-15T04:40:00.000-07:002009-09-15T05:31:39.679-07:00विसोस!!!!videos. (oh good...wow)<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=48251737">Bad Smell in club</a><br/><object width="425px" height="360px" ><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"/><param name="wmode" value="transparent"/><param name="movie" value="http://mediaservices.myspace.com/services/media/embed.aspx/m=48251737,t=1,mt=video"/><embed src="http://mediaservices.myspace.com/services/media/embed.aspx/m=48251737,t=1,mt=video" width="425" height="360" allowFullScreen="true" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent"></embed></object><br /><br /><br /><a href="http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=48251737">Bad Smell in club</a><br/><object width="425px" height="360px" ><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"/><param name="wmode" value="transparent"/><param name="movie" value="http://mediaservices.myspace.com/services/media/embed.aspx/m=48251737,t=1,mt=video"/><embed src="http://mediaservices.myspace.com/services/media/embed.aspx/m=48251737,t=1,mt=video" width="425" height="360" allowFullScreen="true" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent"></embed></object><br /><br /><br /><br /><a href="http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=48238631">Sneezefart</a><br/><object width="425px" height="360px" ><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"/><param name="wmode" value="transparent"/><param name="movie" value="http://mediaservices.myspace.com/services/media/embed.aspx/m=48238631,t=1,mt=video"/><embed src="http://mediaservices.myspace.com/services/media/embed.aspx/m=48238631,t=1,mt=video" width="425" height="360" allowFullScreen="true" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent"></embed></object><br /><br /><br /><object width="560" height="340"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/t-EfrQJhtpU&hl=en&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/t-EfrQJhtpU&hl=en&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="560" height="340"></embed></object><br /><br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/kM53Mq1xGHU&hl=en&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/kM53Mq1xGHU&hl=en&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-5189358154334438672009-09-08T04:36:00.000-07:002009-09-08T04:37:27.553-07:00परचुते गो-कर्ट crashAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaah!<br /><br /><br /><script src="http://i.cdn.turner.com/cnn/.element/js/2.0/video/evp/module.js?loc=dom&vid=/video/us/2009/09/08/vo.crash.utah.cnn" type="text/javascript"></script><noscript>Embedded video from <a href="http://www.cnn.com/video">CNN Video</a></noscript><br /><br />Michigan show this Sat. Riverside Arts CenterKenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-79137446875263654032009-09-04T06:43:00.000-07:002009-09-04T06:44:17.524-07:00क्लोवं doofusThis is awesome.<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/dbaE5OY_yVs&hl=en&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/dbaE5OY_yVs&hl=en&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Saturday September 12th TWO SHOWS!!!!<br /><br />Stand - up comedy live!!!<br /><br /><br />Ypsilanti Michigan 7:30 and 9:30 with an afterparty!!!<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/78369">Tickets are only $12</a><br /><br /><br /><br />Please come!!!Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-77785533689448444572009-09-04T06:39:00.000-07:002009-09-04T06:40:55.196-07:00<a href="http://www.ceetar.com/6thfloor/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/spagandmeat.jpg">sointokenny@zimlinghaus.com</a>Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-10292741839753902392009-09-02T07:01:00.000-07:002009-09-02T07:02:12.862-07:00सो awesomeThis is awesome.<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/dbaE5OY_yVs&hl=en&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/dbaE5OY_yVs&hl=en&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Saturday September 12th TWO SHOWS!!!!<br /><br />Stand - up comedy live!!!<br /><br /><br />Ypsilanti Michigan 7:30 and 9:30 with an afterparty!!!<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/78369">Tickets are only $12</a><br /><br /><br /><br />Please come!!!Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-32760112220967925802009-08-24T18:48:00.000-07:002009-08-24T18:51:24.544-07:00Throwback Jam!Throwback jam post (an oldie but foodie)
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<br />Saturday September 12th TWO SHOWS!!!!
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<br />Stand - up comedy live!!!
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<br />Ypsilanti Michigan 7:30 and 9:30 with an afterparty!!!
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<br /><a href="http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/78369">Tickets are only $12</a>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Please come!!!
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<br />
<br />I hate frogs.
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<br />I like living in NYC because there are no frogs. I hate them because for some reason my brain tells me that I am afraid of them. Why? Why am I afraid of frogs? I'm not afraid of poison from frogs or anything like that. I am fearful of their moves and how not normal it is to hop around. So unpredictable. And sometimes they land on you and just hang out on you. I avoid them. I don't like to see them. You understand.
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<br />Here's how it happened. I was riding bikes one day with my friend Bobby around my neighborhood. Selden, NY. Long Island.
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<br /><img src="http://web03.bestplaces.net/city/Selden_NY.gif"</a>
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<br />I got that map from a paper diner menu.
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<br />Bobby was a tiny kid. Like a freak bald at 11, firecracker-lovin, fetal alcohol-syndrome, swearing, cigarette smoking doosh. We were riding on the road right behind the construction for the new Selden Home Depot!
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<br />We stopped on our bikes and noticed the streets were flooded with little tiny toads. Millions. There were so many they were just spilling in to the sewer drains. And we had been riding over them for a few blocks and didn't noticed.
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<br />My Dyno was covered in pieces of frog.
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<br /><img src="http://bmxmuseum.com/image/bobbys_dyno1_lg.jpg"</a>
<br />*not mine..but looks just like it.
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<br />I panicked. I started pedaling hard and just ditched Bobby. Bye freak. Frog pieces were cascading down all around me. Hitting me on my back. "Is this how I am going to die?"- I thought. "Yes." - I also thought.
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<br />I made it home.
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<br />I left my bike in the driveway.
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<br />Every year, the frogs got bigger and bigger and stronger and stronger. So did I. Well, I got bigger and a little softer. Here is a pic of me during puberty: <img src="http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/muppet/images/thumb/b/b8/Trash_heap.jpg/300px-Trash_heap.jpg"</a>
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<br />
<br /> But I was still terrified about these frogs. I hated cutting the grass, swimming in the pool (you'd have to check the filter for dead frogs), walking around the TWO FROG PONDS MY PARENTS PUT IN! --
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<br />They knew of my fear and still built TWO frog ponds.
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<br />"Oh, you're afraid of bears? Well, we built a Grizzly sanctuary in your bathroom."
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<br />"Oh, you're afraid flying? We moved in to a plane."
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<br />"Oh, you're afraid of your Dad? He lives here everyday. Wait, no he doesn't, you're fine."
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<br />I'm fine.
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<br />Frogs have been in every place I have ever lived in. Not anymore. Thank you NYC.
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<br /><img src="http://www.ufodigest.com/images/rainingfrogs.jpg"</a>
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<br />I'd kill myself!!!
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<br />If it rained frogs on me. Again.
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<br />My family always took the fear as a joke. I will never do that to my kids. I will nurture their fears. Help them to help them grow. I respect their fears. If my kid is afraid of monsters under the bed. I will hire my friends to hide under there. I will pay them to stay until around three a.m., when my kid son is at his loneliest. Then, my buddy...probably <a href="http://www.gregjohnsononline.blogspot.com">Greg</a>, will shake the bed and groan and chant. Real chanting though. Not some <a href="http://www.vp.k12.mo.us/district/athletics/volleyball/images/volleyball-jv-2008.jpg">junior varsity</a> bullshit. Three weeks of legitimate chanting lessons will lead up to this. I will take my kid's fear seriously. And invest in them for the future.
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<br />The fear my child will feel will be real, genuine and I will not scoff at it. Too many parents make this mistake.
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<br />
<br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/WleNCIrvC_Y&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/WleNCIrvC_Y&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>
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<br />Come on!
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<br />I found this. Could barely watch it.
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<br />I could <span style="font-weight:bold;">barley</span> watch it. (that's a funny word mistake to make)
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<br />"I could barley watch that video about the history of beer"
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<br />"I could <span style="font-weight:bold;">barely</span> believe I am friends with you"
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<br />Can't believe you read this.
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<br />Info on chanting <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/lib/authors/dhammayut/chanting.html">here</a>.
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<br />thanks
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<br />Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-37187683492658027532009-08-24T04:08:00.000-07:002009-09-02T07:00:53.483-07:00मिच्गिना शो तिक्केट्स ओं सेल नो!This is awesome.<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/dbaE5OY_yVs&hl=en&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/dbaE5OY_yVs&hl=en&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Saturday September 12th TWO SHOWS!!!!<br /><br />Stand - up comedy live!!!<br /><br /><br />Ypsilanti Michigan 7:30 and 9:30 with an afterparty!!!<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/78369">Tickets are only $12</a><br /><br /><br /><br />Please come!!!Kenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36764622.post-34162684993249203102009-08-18T08:52:00.000-07:002009-08-18T09:00:26.370-07:00लोटस तो गेट तो!So much going on. Bloggin has taken a back seat. <br /><br />"But why Kenny?" You say.<br /><br />"It is what supposed to happen" I retort.<br /><br />"Uh....what does that mean?" you ask.<br /><br />I ignore the question and move on.<br /><br /><br /><br />Here's what's going on.<br /><br /><br />BIG BIG BIG BIG BIG Show in Michigan!<br /><br /><a href="http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/78369">TICKETS ARE ONLY $12!</a><br /><br />Its at the Riverside Arts Center in Ypsilanti.<br /><br />There are 2 shows so make sure you pick the best one when you order. Best one for you!<br /><br />Also --- <br /><br />I took part in this video with my friend Sara Benincasa and its like the #1 comedy video in 23 countries! WHHHHHHHHAAAAAATTT????<br /><br /><br />Here it is.<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/iK8asj9z990&hl=en&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/iK8asj9z990&hl=en&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br /><br /><br />AND AND also -- <br /><br /><br />My band "Food"'s first song is for sale for only 99c on Itunes!!!!! <br /><br />That's <a href="http://www.apple.com/search/ipoditunes/?q=kenny+zimlinghaus">HERE</a><br /><br /><br />Thanks.<br /><br />See you soon.<br /><br /><br />KennyKenny Zimlinghaushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13696329095205692725noreply@blogger.com