Some facebook status messages I've seen recently:


"Nadya can't find #7,4,and 12" - Octomom.

"Dave is hoping those black guys I just saw don't rob me" - NY Post Cartoonist

"Michael Jackson is so fucked..he's like a kid getting fucked by Michael Jackson" - Michael Jackson

"Chris Brown has gone from 'in a relationship' to 'single'" - Rihanna

"Travis is starting not to like this woman" - Travis the chimp.

"Alex is juicing right now" - A-Rod.

"FB is excited to own all your stuff" - Facebook


eeeright...

Here's a picture for you:




Nice body, kid.



have a good day.

Helloooo.

Big Headline today: Chimp attack!!!



This ends kind of sad. But, Travis the chimp could eat at the table and drink from a glass, but he attacked someone out of nowhere and had to be put down. Just check out how cool looking Travis was:




So wise.


Damn. Sorry to see him go. He looks so awesome. Wanna watch movies from Netflix instantly with him every day.

Man....

Can't believe this chimp flipped out. He was famous. He let it get to his head.

Bye Travis.



Now let's look at some great chimp pics:




Brings tears to my eyes.




I used to work for this guy.



A Beautiful Mind.


See how this website works? Quick--easy.

Also --

I'll be doing stand up March 4-7 in Lexington KY if you are in the United States area you should come. The place is called Comedy Off Broadway.